The Power of Female Friendship

I’ve been thinking a lot about friendship lately. All those friendships that we women have with other women.

The Circle We Keep

Deep and meaningful conversations, laughing until your stomach hurts and even those times when you show those ugly tears that expose the hurt or sadness you might be feeling deep down. Having a tight inner circle that sees all the good and quirky aspects of us is crucial. The friends who don’t judge you for your differences but accept and love you unconditionally. Being our true selves is part of opening up to a new friendship and being totally 100% vulnerable in every way. It's effortless for us to close off and distance ourselves from getting hurt when we've been there, done that, and been made a monster by a person I believe has no idea what true friendship means.

When the Circle Shifts

I'd like to share a little about my story and experiences with forming lasting friendships, as well as when my inner circle changes. Sometimes its shape grows or shrinks, and sometimes its members swap out. It's a way of allowing us to grow with changes we didn't know would happen, and to allow for a constant flow in saying goodbye to things that could harm us, or in allowing things to take a back seat and move forward for new friendships in our lives.

Friendship should make us better as people, encouraging us to be caring and compassionate towards one another, and to feel comforted knowing that we have an inner circle that wants the best for us, and we for them.

A Lesson in Letting Go

I moved away from my home country, secure in the knowledge that my friendships would be there for me no matter what. I moved to be closer to an old friend who I thought had my best interest at heart… This is where the lessons come into play. I struggled with living so far from home and missing the home comforts, people I adored, and familiar places that no longer existed.

To make a long story short, I was up and down in my emotions and felt lonely in the only friendship I knew here in Belfast…. I started a new job and met some friends at the bank where I worked, but I wasn’t sure if I should open up and show them all of myself. However, I did find friendship in the few that made me feel happy, safe and wanted. I should have got all this from the friend I moved to be closer to, but that friendship started to dwindle, and I began to grow, see my worth, and understand what true friendship means to me. Ten months of living in a foreign country, that rocky friendship ended.

What I Know Now

My takeaway is that sometimes you learn the hard way, sometimes you see people’s true colours, and sometimes you grow, a little raw and hurt, but willing to keep climbing and use this experience as a lesson to say this is what I won’t accept or allow to repeat in the future. Oh, and that last thing... You set that old friendship free and bless them on their journey. There is no point holding onto anything that no longer serves you and makes you feel good about yourself. It's ok to remove negative energy from your world… It's ok to end things and be brave. Who knows what's waiting around the corner.

A Brighter Chapter

I moved out of the home I shared with my friend and her classmate and moved in with three other Irish girls, who showed me the crazy and fun nightlife of Belfast. It was an experience I'll never forget, and I was so glad I met and lived with the girls on Blacks Road. It was exactly what I needed at a time when things felt very uncertain for me.

This Is Just The Beginning

There is so much to share about friendship: the good, the bad and the in-between. I don’t want this first blog to turn into a book, so please follow along and tune in to a future chapter of stories that might help you shape and grow your friendships.

Go Boldly, Make A New Friend

You never know who might walk into your life when you make space for someone new.